My world as it evolves

a+picture+of+myself+I+took+before+writing+this+column.

Emma Zawacki

a picture of myself I took before writing this column.

I’ve spent weeks trying to find a theme for my Editor’s Column. 

I searched for a short, catchy sentence to title this tri-weekly story I’ll be writing, yet I always seemed to fall short. 

But this idea came to me while I was at family dinner—not dinner with my family, but with the Mixes. 

I struggled to find a theme I could write about without running out of ideas; I wanted each story to be an original idea of mine, not some new flower metaphor that I continue to recycle.

I decided that my life is changing at a pace too rapid to put a name to—I’m flirting with different stages of life, and I would hate to have to pick a singular one. 

I’m working on growing—on evolving—to new heights this year; I’m growing to reach the independency I have craved since childhood, to reach the fruit that has flourished after my years of labor.    

This column is about change: the change I’ve gone through in my almost 17 years on this planet and the change I will endure this upcoming year as I struggle to cram a lifetime of getting to know myself into a college essay. 

I enjoy writing about emotions as they present themselves—I write sad columns as tears roll down my face and I scribble joyous memories down while I brush sand from the lined paper of my favorite place; this column is about encapsulating that.  

My world is evolving at a pace that I can’t seem to keep up with. My heart and my head are in conflicting phases of life, and I’m struggling to pick one to follow—definite decisions have never been my forte, yet this upcoming year seems to be when I’ll be forced to finally pick one or the other. 

I’m flirting with different stages of life, and I would hate to have to pick a singular one.”

And I suppose I’ll spend my senior year watching my head wage war on my heart and summing it up into 400 word stories to publish and take pretty pictures to match. In the same sense, I’ll spend my senior year documenting myself as I grow out of my childhood bedroom and learn to fly with the wings I’ve been given. 

I’m determined to embrace my future gracefully—I’ve always walked on the balls of my feet so as not to disturb those around me; even so, I can’t wait for the stumbles I’ll endure as they help shape me. 

As this year unfolds in front of me, however hectic it may be, I can’t wait to look back upon this year with a smile spread across my face. My world is forever evolving, and I can’t wait to write about it.