I’m not sorry for myself


As a young, growing boy, I would always play pretend with my siblings. I pretended to be a pirate plundering a village, a superhero saving the day, or an astronaut exploring the galaxy. Fantasies kept my mind occupied but made me lose my sight of reality. The story usually ends up in the protagonist’s favor, and they get a happy ending.

In reality, the world can be cruel to us. It’s impossible to determine what will happen next. To some extent, we could say that our lives are based on a roll of a dice.

Fantasies made me believe in the worst of things because our world doesn’t work in the same way.

I’d like if I always get our way and if everything was in my control. This world is confusing with its unexpected confusing twists and turns.

I’ve come to accept that I’ll never know what to expect tomorrow.”

I’ve come to accept that I’ll never know what to expect tomorrow. My teacher might assign me a time-consuming project, my guinea pigs could die, or I could lose my job.

It’s easy to complain about these unreasonable things that have happened to me. I’ve pointed fingers to these things as the reason I’m broken. I’ve blamed my past choices as the reason I keep messing up.

I can’t change my past choices or what is to come. I am not sorry for myself because I know that I could’ve done better. It may sound harsh but I believe sometimes I need to toughen up.

The outcomes of this world are uncontrollable, but I believe that whatever happens, I can make the best of it. I’m not going to complain because I’ll take my life head-on with grit and determination in order to get where I want.