Disney is the root of my despondency


The nostalgic memories of Disney seem quite popular with the current high school students, but so does depression and anxiety. 

At first, I believed there was no way that the two could correlate, yet the more I look into it, the more I realize they do. 

Cinderella was one of the first Disney movies I watched. The perfect love story of the small-town girl and the high-class boy made for a thrilling story to my four-year-old self. 

The fantasy of meeting the prince that could make your life perfect quickly attached itself to my dreams, but I did not allow myself to watch those dreams come to life. 

I found myself losing sleep while waiting for Peter Pan to take me on an adventure. I would wait and wait, hoping that I never had to grow up. 

I would look through the binoculars at the top of my run-down swing set and try to spot Captain Hook’s ship above the clouds.

The careful summer breeze would sneak through my slightly-opened window each night. I hoped it would carry a new story with it, yet that hope never came true. 

I believed the pond in my backyard held Ariel and her sisters; I believed it held excitement. However, I stayed far from the water. I was afraid that Ursula was lurking at the surface. 

I yearned for the strength of Mulan. I spent countless hours on the swing set, acting as though the swings were my horse as I rode into battle. I would climb the wooden mountains holding up the structure of the swings. 

I would climb the gargantuan willow tree and swing from the malleable branches. I lived my life through the eyes of Tarzan and never looked back. 

Disney has set my expectations so high that they simply seem unattainable.”

Even the simplistic way of reading books seemed enchanting to me. 

However, I reached a point where I discovered these hopes and dreams would never come true. I reached a point where everything began to disappoint me. 

My prince is not coming.

There is no adventure heading my way. 

The pond in my backyard is empty.

My strength will never size up to that of others. 

The willow tree cannot support my creativity any longer. 

Reading books only feels like an assignment.

Disney has set my expectations so high that they simply seem unattainable.

I know my childhood dreams will not come true, but there is still a piece of me that longs for the day that one of them does.