My Undetermined Future


If you were to look back on some of the most recent columns on The Central Trend, you would see most of them are about time passing by too quickly and a fast approaching future. I’m not a senior, or junior, or even a new freshman; so I really shouldn’t have to worry about my future approaching… right? Wrong.

A few days ago as I walked the halls, I overheard conversations about where my peers were sending college letters. In their 10th grade English class, with Mr. George, my friends were sending letters to colleges and considering their options and planning their future. Mr. George’s classes also were beginning to plan field trips to travel to different colleges in Michigan. Everyone had already begun to think about their future plans. Everyone had an idea of how they wanted their future plans to lay out and what colleges they wanted to apply to. So, I asked myself the question: “Where do you see yourself after you graduate?” An unsettling feeling of anxiety and panic came over me. Where do I see myself after I graduate? To be completely and brutally honest, I don’t know.

For as long as I can remember, I have always wanted to be a professional ballerina. I have never pictured my life any other way and I don’t plan to. Each day I spend at the studio makes me more and more determined to make it in the small ballet world. I love to dance and I spend up to 20 hours a week perfecting and improving on my technique. This has always been my dream.

But as I hear about the plans of my peers, I can’t help but think, what if ballet doesn’t work out? What would I do then? So I come back to the same question… Where do you see yourself after you graduate?

My future is undetermined, an unfinished book, a missing chapter. While everyone seems to have an idea with what they want to do, I don’t. Could I picture a future in journalism? Or do I continue on my path of wanting to be a ballerina?

In order to be a professional ballerina, there are so many things I would have to be willing to give up; one of them would be only coming to school part time or becoming homeschool. Am I really willing to give up a normal teenage life for a life of a ballerina? If I were to do something in journalism would I even be talented enough to get a steady line of work?

I don’t really know where I will end up or how my future will play out. Will I go into journalism, ballet, or even something completely different? As I continue to listen to the endless amount of chatter about sending college letters and visits, I can only ask myself this repeating question… where do you see yourself after you graduate?  Again, I don’t really know.