I open my jewelry box and the deep, rich hue of a garnet gem catches my eye: the stone signifies a new beginning, a new month, January.
With a new year comes an abundance of change and new goals. Each new year is an added weight on my chest, for I have so many things I want to accomplish. Many look forward to the prospect of a new year; I, however, dread it.
The weight on my chest is a constant reminder of the tasks I have yet to complete and the priorities I have to set straight; the beginning of a new year only exasperates this. I have so many resolutions to become a “better” version of myself, many of them are unrealistic, but despite this, I still add them to the list.
When the clock strikes midnight, announcing the new year, I reminisce over the past and feel the burden of the future. When January begins, I sit on the edge of my seat, just waiting for something to go wrong. My set schedules and strict plans are great until I slip up. The goals often set by societal expectations set off a ticking clock in my head—constantly reminding me of what needs to be accomplished.
Throughout my life, I have put an excessive amount of pressure on myself to be the best I can be. I aspire for the best grades, the perfect life, and a flawless personality. The list that holds my goals is usually filled with unrealistic expectations that set me up for failure. I have come to realize that I need to create attainable goals.
This year I have one goal, and one goal only: to be content with myself, accept my mistakes, and celebrate my wins. Some may think it’s cliché but I will strive my hardest to achieve this. I have always been my worst critic for any mistake made. Every error gets analyzed by my brain, picking apart each and every slip-up that occurs. When I am successful or do something “good” I never allow myself to be proud. In 2024 I want to embrace my mistakes instead of beating myself up over them. I want to be proud of myself for my successes rather than pretending they are worth nothing.
As the garnet gem in my jewelry box gleams with the promise of new beginnings and reminds me of the past, I will try to embrace the future. The pressure I face persists, except, this year, I will grant myself a little more grace. I will remember that a new year may come with pressure but it also offers the prospect of a blank slate—a chance to approach life with a fresh perspective.
