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Humans of FHC: Valerie Greenwood

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Humans of FHC: Valerie Greenwood

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“I was at the Michigan football game. There were a lot of squirrels there. I really relate to squirrels just as an animal. Me and squirrels are kind of the same. I wanted to make sure they were nice and fat and fed for the winter, so I collected acorns for them so I could feed them as I passed them. I was wearing overalls, and I got all these acorns and de-shelled them- everything was looking good- and I put them all in my pocket. But [the squirrels] weren’t into me. They didn’t like me; it really hurt. I ended up needing to pee really bad because I’m a human. I went to the bathroom; I was ‘squirrel-brained,’ and I just took those overalls off. All the acorns fell on the floor. So there were just a bunch of little brown pellets falling on the bathroom floor, and there were other people in the bathroom. I had to pick up the nasty things off the ground, so then I had a pocket full of nuts. I had to throw them all out because I didn’t want to give the squirrels E. coli because then they would die. It was really stressful.”

(Sophomore)

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About the Writer
Reena Mathews, Editor in Chief

Reena Mathews is now entering her third year on The Central Trend and second year as Editor in Chief. She has always loved to read and write and is...

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Humans of FHC: Valerie Greenwood