There are people who come and go throughout our lives. It’s a fact. Not everyone we encounter follows us to the end. Whether we know it or not, people’s time together has an expiration date. Personally, I have had a fair amount of people leave me behind, and each and every time it leaves me rattled. One could assume that after countless experiences with losing friends, I would be immune to the pain the losses bring. Yet with each experience comes the familiar feelings of emptiness, loneliness, and grief. However, within each devastating incident, I believe there lies a silver lining.

No matter how a friendship ends, I think it’s extremely important to look at the positive impact the relationship had on my life. Even if it takes me a couple weeks to get over the initial pain, I try to remember the relationship for the good memories, not the tragic ending. By doing so, grudges are alleviated, and I am able to live my life as a more optimistic person. Holding the past against a person is a ridiculous and unhealthy way to live life. After the first waves of misery, I try to take the memories of tears and grief, and instead choose to remember the times of laughter and joy.

This action, however, is easier said than done. Moving past the arguments and forgetting the pain that comes with a friendship that ended isn’t and never will be easy. However, holding feelings of grief, sadness, and anger against others isn’t a healthy way to live. So no matter how difficult or how much time it takes to fully move past the arguments and tears, it’s worth it in the end. Remembering people for the good memories and happy moments is a much better way to live life.

In the end, it’s up to you on how you decide to move past feelings. While being left alone is painful and not easy in any way, in the end it’s up to you to chose how you feel. It may be difficult to think optimistically, especially after being hurt, but in the end, you’ll be brought more joy. Grief doesn’t have to lead to sadness; it can lead to happiness, eventually.