Don’t Judge a Fan By Their Cover
It’s 1:00 a.m., I’ve been awake for nineteen hours now, and I can’t seem to stop reading this online personal theory conclusion of Phantom of the Opera.
Hours have passed since I last left the confines of my bedroom, and my eyes are straining from the focus with which I’ve been exuberantly studying each and every detail I can encounter. My head hurts from all of the over-analyzing and deciphering, and I’ve thought about going to bed about six times in the past minute.
But I don’t.
I keep reading, evaluating, comparing opinions, learning all I can. I don’t care that I’m tired or how tomorrow is going to be difficult, I love what I’m doing. I’ll take one thousand awful days if it means I’m able to continue researching for a few more hours.
This is what it’s like to be a fan.
Fanatics don’t obtain any respect from people who can’t understand what it’s like to have an obsession.
We’re insulted and scoffed at by those who have interests instead of passions and a detached mind when it comes to books, movies, TV shows, videogames, etc. They do not comprehend what it’s like to be absorbed into an alternate universe–where everything is different–and to thrive there more than you would if it were out in the real world. How hours upon hours can pass before you realize that all you’ve done throughout the entirety of the day is spend your time nestled into the comforting embrace of your fascination. That feeling of profuse connection to a storyline or character and the need to know everything you possibly can find out about it.
There are some people who are only intricately owned by one certain topic: comics, anime shows, Disney, etc. But if you’re somebody like me, almost anything can enrapture you in that vice-like way. I’ve had more obsessions than I can count, always analyzing every aspect of a plot, character, setting, or background of a story. I remember every single one of them in eloquent detail, none of them ever actually leaving me. The “Animorphs” craze of fourth grade kept me busy for nearly two years, bringing about some top-notch conversational material and game ideas with the neighbor kids. My recurring “Harry Potter” phases practically engulf me in a haze of enamor for months at a time, annoying about everyone in my vicinity. A long and continuous preoccupation with Supernatural and quite a vivid love of Phantom of the Opera captivate me currently, and far more have occurred along the road so far.
Some might think that I would become tired or bored of spending my waking hours reading plot theories, listening to soundtrack playlists, memorizing character analyses, etc., but I’ve never once thought of it as work. I thoroughly enjoy the broadening of my understanding and that strong sense of accomplishment that comes from eons of devoted enslavement to my infatuations. If you’re passionate about something, the amount of time you are willing to dedicate to it is limitless.
This isn’t a shoutout to the sports or theater or high school fanatics who are understood by your peers and teachers, no. This is for those of you who are scolded and immured for loving something so much that you devote all of your time and effort to it. The ones who feel guilty for spending their night enthralled in the pursuit of unaccepted knowledge and adventures.
For the kids who don’t do their homework because they don’t want to stop; want to finish that level on their game, read the rest of their book, watch six more episodes of that show, or read another analysis.
Trust me, sometimes I wish I could do that, too. And sometimes I do do that. I know as well as anyone that it’s hard to get out.
So for anyone who is told that the things they love to do most in the world will get them nowhere in life? Know that I understand you; that I believe in your zeal and fanaticism. You will find people who accept you and support those decisions.
Our passions will take us everywhere in life. You may struggle to achieve goals or pay the bills sometimes, but does that really compare in the long run to doing what you love?
I know for a fact that I don’t want to be stuck in some corporate management field sitting behind a desk for the rest of my life. Of course, that would be a stable route to take with an assured amount of money and benefits that would make my life easier, but it’s not what I want to do. I want to explore, be captivated by my work, and wake up every morning and not dread the day. And if that ruins my chances at living an easy life, so be it. I’ll die before you see me in an occupation that doesn’t make me happy.
Let your passions lead you and listen to your heart.
You’ll be fine, I promise.
Katianna Mansfield is 5ft tall, making her the smallest and most feisty server at IHOP. She feeds on stress and is terrified of commitment.
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