A compulsion to reach for your phone, to check for a new notification, to make sure you haven’t missed any earth-shattering events since the last time you flipped over your compact device—sound familiar? If you’re under 30, the answer is probably a yes.
Signs at the doctor’s office tell us that it’s recommended to spend no more than two hours per day looking at screens. Realistically, most of us Gen Z-ers triple that number on a daily basis, if not quadruple it. It’s normal for checking our phones to be the first thing we do in the morning and the last thing we do before falling asleep. In fact, it quite possibly is what we’re doing as we’re falling asleep—mindlessly scrolling, watching videos, or still checking social media as the time on our phones switches from p.m. to a.m.
We bring our phones with us to every place we go and keep them by our sides for virtually the entire day. It seems that for almost all the hours we are awake, we are one with our devices.
While this is far from mind-blowing information, the social fatigue our technology addictions create is becoming increasingly recognized as a problem. People are realizing they aren’t alone in not having the energy to respond to countless messages or to answer multiple FaceTime calls with arbitrary questions at all hours of the day.
Because of the twisted magnetism between us and our phones, we are constantly contactable. Whether by friends, family, colleagues, or otherwise, we can be reached at any time of day—or night, for that matter.
The fact that our phones provide constant communication is a basic function of the devices. But, how often do we actually think about what this means for us as humans? With phones, we are perpetually immersed in a social setting.
Obviously, we don’t spend every waking second staring at our phones—at least, hopefully not. That being said, we’re not necessarily reachable at any given time. Most of us do take time away from our devices, even if it’s just for a quick meal, errand, or practice. In addition, especially during school hours, many of us use the Do Not Disturb (DND) setting, the feature that prioritizes our focus by silencing notifications.
Regardless, however, it’s not like our notifications just disappear. When we inevitably return to our devices or turn off DND, our missed messages and calls are waiting for us. So, while we take time away from our devices, we remain available and contactable—just available and contactable at a slightly later time.
Regardless of how often we look at our phones, we can always receive messages from others. This, put simply, can be exhausting.
Even if from well-intentioned loved ones, opening our phones to an onslaught of Instagram Reels—each video requiring its own reaction—or Snapchat video messages becomes overwhelming. Reading through missed texts of—let’s face it—debatable importance becomes fatiguing. Quickly, dealing with notifications can transform into a chore.
Whether because we don’t want to answer or because we can’t muster the extra energy to respond, ghosting people becomes a more appealing option. With the expectation of answering with the correct amount of enthusiasm or anger to an extensive saga of text messages, avoiding the app altogether can feel like the only bearable solution.
However, constant connection isn’t just harmful when we’re receiving messages. The issue carries over to when we send messages as well. For example, maybe having the unrestrained ability to send impassioned rants to friends isn’t actually benefiting us. While therapeutic in the moment, not filling a three-minute audio message with a ceaseless stream of angry commentary could help us learn to emotionally regulate ourselves.
On both sides of the spectrum, constant connectivity is not only damaging our mental health, but it is ruining our relationships. With easy access to a friend or family member through a few quick texts—or worse, blurry selfies of half our face—there is less incentive to make in-person plans with someone. Why bother with the hassle of scheduling an actual activity when we can instead catch up over a few mutually relatable TikTok videos?
Constant connection is causing an epidemic of social fatigue, an inability to control our emotions ourselves, and increasingly surface-level relationships. In large part, these issues seem daunting to solve. Phones are clearly an irreplaceable aspect of life, one that’s not disappearing anytime soon.
Even so, the more we acknowledge that constant connection can be harmful, the easier tackling the issue becomes.
