She knows she does it. She knows someday, it’s going to be an issue. She knows she should hold back a little bit, and she should be more careful. She knows that someday she’s going to get burned because she didn’t realize that she was playing with fire.

She gets too attached. She opens her heart up really quickly, and she leaves enough space for anyone to get in. People take advantage of that. People burrow their way into her heart and create such a deep hole she doesn’t know how to fill when they’re gone.

She’s really bad at protecting herself—she doesn’t really know how to. She doesn’t know how to do anything other than allow people in. She doesn’t know how to keep them out.

She’s really good at wishing, though. She wishes that she knew what she was doing. She wishes that she knew how to respect herself enough to know when to let people in and when to shut them out. She can wish upon a million stars like no one else can, but that doesn’t make her wishes come true.

Wishing doesn’t actually accomplish anything. Wishing just makes it hurt more because she knows that no matter how much she wishes, things aren’t just going to magically happen for her. She’s going to need to learn how to protect herself. She’s going to need to learn how to keep her guard up. Wishing isn’t going to make it happen.

She thinks she’s learning, because she’s started slowly pushing people away, but that’s not what she wants either. She thinks that the solution is to push away the people who have already made it in. She can do that. She can push people away after they’ve already gotten to her, but she can’t keep them away before they were ever really in.

She doesn’t want to push people away. She wants to keep them at bay so they won’t ever be close enough to give her a reason to push them away. She wants them to stay at a distance; she is so sick of people digging in to leave gaping holes. She’s sick of having to patch things up, and she’s sick of having to be the bigger person about it.

She wants to know how to protect herself because right now, she’s an open book, and her heart is a bracelet. One that she is always willing to share. She doesn’t know how to keep it to herself. She doesn’t know how to not give it away, but she doesn’t want to. She wants to say ‘no’ when someone asks if they can wear it.

She knows now that she is playing with fire. She realizes that if she doesn’t get it under control, if she doesn’t learn how to handle it, she’s going to get burned. She’s going to be torn into. It’s starting to happen already, but she doesn’t know how to save herself.