Lately, I’ve been feeling the need to hold on to the present for as long as I can. It’s my junior year of high school, and it’s now just hit me that I’m not living out my high school experience as I promised. But the phrase “better late than never” is a constant mantra that I’ve been circulating through my head these past few months. 

What worries me isn’t the fact that I won’t be able to remember all of the experiences from high school, but rather how I choose to let those experiences define me going forward. I only have about 1.5 years until I graduate. To others, that may seem like a lot—but to me, it almost feels like little to no time. But one thing I know for sure is that it’s ultimately up to me what I decide to do with that time. 

People might call me crazy for this, but I swear I have a photographic memory. Moments that are dear to my heart make a place inside of my head, almost like a mental chronological timeline including the following: the time, date, setting, clothing, and people. Yet for some reason, when it comes to studying, whatever I try to retain goes in one ear and out the other. 

Don’t get me wrong, there are always going to be days when I just don’t feel like doing anything, and that’s not to say that it’s okay to give up, but if there’s anything that I’ve learned within the past year, it’s that a bad day is not a bad life, and neither is a bad semester of grades. 

But being the busy high schooler that I am, it’s hard to keep a plethora of memories that have been created within such a short time all in the same container. Memories for me can be as big as a picture, or as little as a piece of paper. They come in all forms for me, and all that it has to take for me to reminisce on them is having the object to be within my proximity. 

My freshman year of high school was online, so no memories could actually be solidified that year. But little did I know that even then, I was a  journalist just waiting to get her training wheels so that eventually, she could emerge as the next Jane Austen. 

In fact, I was such a journalist that I wrote every day I had school online, during my freshman year. Two years later, here I am citing something that I wrote about a week before school started on a website that gets over 1,000 views on the daily. 

August 26, 2020 

And I quote, 

“I wish I read and wrote more, but I just don’t know how to achieve those goals.” 

When I tell you my mind was blown, I mean that I can’t believe my freshman self wrote that. If I could, I would travel back in time and go scream at myself to keep going because that’s somewhat what happened. Despite the fact that I spent an entire school year solely on just a computer alone, I wouldn’t have it any other way; however, here is what I would’ve done differently. 

I will always be the girl who hides behind the glasses—that’s just me, and that’s not something that I will ever change, I just wish I didn’t let it affect my social life. I wish I had chosen to live a little more in my first semester of sophomore year. 

But no matter how hard I try, I now realize that there’s nothing I can do to change that; instead of trying to change my attitude about the future, I waste my present days reminiscing on the past. 

Luckily, I no longer have to worry about that because I now have a memory of something, somewhere at some point in my life that will always bring me back right where I’m supposed to be: the present. 

Sophomore year 2021 – 2022 

August 23 2021

On my first day of school, I wore a floral romper with Converse and a sheer black shirt. Nevertheless, it’s pretty safe to say it was the best day of my life. Walking into school for the first time felt like I was walking into a new planet, even though I literally lived right across the street.  All my teachers recognized me as Akansha’s sister, and when I met Mr. George, his very first words were something along the lines of this: “Are you Akansha’s sister, she’s such a good human being.” 

August 26, 2021 

On the last day of freshman year, my history teacher urged us to visit him in person if we planned on attending FHC in person next year. Three months later, that’s exactly what I did. When I visited him, I was wearing a green crewneck. The fifth period had just ended, and I had just come out of my US History class, and there he was. In the corner of his classroom with the same Yankees flag in the background, my high school experience was finally starting to come to life. He didn’t recognize me with my mask on, but as soon as I revealed myself, it was almost like a lightbulb had gone off in his head. He was filled with joy and was so eager to see what teachers I had this year. When he found out I was joining the school newspaper, he was so delighted and was so adamant about trying to switch me into his US History class. The second I left, I had realized I lost my computer, but instead of doing what any sane person would do and retracing my steps, I instead decided to interrupt his class during class instruction. I walked straight in, again, bumped into one of the desks in the back row and walked straight up to him, and asked if he could help me find my laptop. The whole class was staring at me, but once he was done giving instructions he searched the entire classroom and then told me to go to the office and get the key to my 5th-hour class. 

September 25, 2021 

With anything in life, there’s a first for everything. As a freshman, it was my first time doing school from home, but last year was my first school dance ever. I went with two people that I had no social interaction with and it ended up being very memorable. We were on the football field instead of the gym, which is why I had a cardigan on the whole time. There was punch and everyone was dancing; we eventually started a moshpit. The most memorable part of the entire night wasn’t even the dance, it was when my friends spontaneously phoned me at 10:00 p.m., asking if I wanted to get dinner at Kitchen 67. Our waitress was new and forgot our bill because by the time we left, we were the only ones left in the restaurant. 

October 30, 2021 

I wasn’t doing much for Halloween this year; for Pete’s sake, I was taking AP US History. I didn’t have time for anything those days. I think I was growing into that phase of wanting to go trick-or-treating but not wanting to be judged. Regardless, I still went and I painted pumpkins. I was a devil, but I didn’t put a lot of effort into the outfit, but I was wearing lots of red, which I’ve been told is a color that I seem to make work. The most memorable part of it though was that the week of Halloween, I received one of the best scores I had ever gotten on the APUSH quizzes. 

November 23, 2021

This was the first year I spent Thanksgiving with people outside of the home, and the first time I felt a part of something bigger than myself. I had brought pumpkin pie for the big feast and hadn’t even realized that my shirt was matching the color of the pie: pumpkin spice. It was the first time I actually started connecting with some of the people in the school newspaper and was the start of some very meaningful friendships for me. 

December 17, 2021 

I was very satisfied with myself; I had just finished the first semester of my sophomore year and couldn’t have been more proud of the grades that I ended with. For my birthday, I have given a Washington and Jefferson Sweatshirt from the college my sister attends and believed that it was good luck. I wore it during my Algebra 2 exam and was convinced that I only passed the exam because I wore the sweatshirt. 

January 

I had just come back from an amazing winter break and was prepared to take on the new semester. I had one goal in mind: to do better than last semester because if I did it once, I could definitely do it again. Just like seashells, we humans also have to learn to let go and be released into the ocean in order to find our role in this world, which is the first object I think of when I think about January. 

February 1, 2022, 

This month will always be a time in my life that lives rent-free in my head, and it’s not because of all the love that is in the air during this time of year. It’s because I was finally able to ask the questions no one else was willing to. My uncle died in the summer of 2021, and he had given my dad a blue quarter zip sweatshirt. He was always into reading books and staying updated on the news, and so now, I write articles and joined Model UN as a way to commemorate him. I wore his sweatshirt to school and went to go interview a teacher for a story that I was writing, and it ended up being one of the best days of my life. I walked out of that interview having a more positive outlook on life, because here is the lesson I learned that day; your grades were and never will be a true measurement and reflection of intelligence. They are simply just numbers. 

March 22, 2022 

For many reasons, March has always been a tough month for me. It’s the month of my dad’s birthday, the month when COVID-19 happened, and the last time I got to see my uncle before he passed away. Whenever I used to think about this month, all I think about is remorse, but now, all that I think about is growth. We’re all going to have days where we just don’t feel like getting up, and sometimes, it’s going to take more than just the mindset of “I’m going to get through this,” to be able to push yourself. I found it hard to keep going in March, but luckily, there was one staff member and upperclassman who were willing to help me get through that phase in my life. I now know that whenever it feels like me against the world, no matter how hard life gets, the people that I surround myself with will never give up on me. 

April 2, 2022

I was just glad we were finally on spring break and close to the end of the year; my grades weren’t the best, and AP exams were upon us. Nonetheless, South Padre, Texas was really fun, and the only reason I remember it is because of my S.T.A.R Labs sweatshirt. Now you’re probably wondering why on Earth I would bring a sweatshirt to such a hot area, and it’s because it got really cold on the plane as well as at night when we stayed in the Airbnb. 

May 10, 2022 

FHC Inspires was finally happening. This was an event I kept hearing about, ever since the beginning of the school year from my English teacher. Just like my sister, I too thought that I would be able to go up on stage and talk in front of hundreds of parents and teachers, but unfortunately, I just had too much on my plate at the time. But that’s okay, I still got the chance to present my speech in front of about thirty students and one of my favorite teachers, Mr. George. 

June, July, and August 

The summer was pretty special for me. Nothing out of the ordinary happened this time but things have changed; people are moving and we’re all finally growing up. I’m finally marking the new start of a chapter in my life. One of our best friends finally got married, and I got to put on Henna for the celebration: one of my absolute favorite wedding festivities. 

September 24, 2022 

Ah, the first month of junior year, it’s stressful, right? Surprisingly, no. Sure it’s a lot, but at the time, it didn’t seem like a lot, and the adrenaline boost I got from the rigor of AP classes and grades only motivated me to try harder and look junior year in the eyes and say “I can do this.” The weekend trip to Sandusky, Ohio to go visit Camels really put the cherry on top and really made that first month all worthwhile. 

October 26, 2022 

But for some reason when I think of October, I don’t think about how spooky it gets around these parts or how cold it gets; I think about MIPA. And before you ask, no, it’s not those standardized tests we took in elementary school; it’s the Michigan Interscholastic Press Association, an annual conference where writers get the chance to attend sessions to learn about how they can improve their school newspaper. Now, I not only have a shirt to encapsulate all the memories I made there, but also closer relationships with the people I was able to share the experience with. 

Although these are just a few of the many pieces of objects that hold a dear memory within my consciousness, I have comfort in knowing that my memories aren’t going anywhere. They’re right here and are not going anywhere. Every article that I’ve written on The Central Trend is a memory because every column is a snapshot of the current status of my life, which I think is what makes my memories so unique from each other.