Goodbye for now

Although I am leaving, I plan on coming back. 

I like the comfort of knowing that, even through a stressful and strenuous day, I can walk into room 139 with a smile on my face as my worries dissipate. 

My semester in this room has been filled with late stories, mental breakdowns, laughs, pizza, stress, new friends, and my favorite of all, TCT meetings. Writing for TCT has been an escape – when I am not stressing about it. 

I do not know how I will do next semester when I don’t walk into room 139 every day. It confuses my brain because the room constantly wraps around me like a blanket holding me; on days I am not at school I miss it, so the fact that I am leaving hurts and it makes me feel like I am leaving a family.”

— Hazel Bentley

The first day I remember walking in and just thinking, ‘What is going on?’

Now I walk in and realize how safe this room has been for the past four months. It started with learning about each story and getting a week to write as well. I was stressing for at least a day for each story pondering what my topic was going to be. It seems only so small now.

The workload was hard to get around, and I am still not around it- as much as I wish to be. The pressure on my shoulders weighed me down, keeping me from swimming free. 

I do not know how I will do next semester when I don’t walk into room 139 every day. It confuses my brain because the room constantly wraps around me like a blanket holding me; on days I am not at school I miss it, so the fact that I am leaving hurts and it makes me feel like I am leaving a family.

Mentally I’m not where I need to be to stay on staff, so I have to leave; when I am where I should be, I might come back for more stories, meetings, award ceremonies, and being one big family. 

Sitting in the second row, the third column, right next to Kiera Kemppainen, most of the time we could be laughing at something one of us said, or even at Finn.

Finn Willis has sat within a five-foot radius from me throughout the whole semester–if that was next to me, behind, or in front of me, he was near me like a little kid, and although he makes flame come out of the side of my head, I love him and would not have made it through TCT without him. 

The little conversations that I have with whoever mean a lot to me, connecting in some random way. When on the first day, I thought there was no way I was going to be able to remember all these names, now I could go off and say everyone’s name in a minute. 

When I signed up for the class, I did not have an idea in the world what I was getting myself into, although I did know I would find a way to make it fun for myself. Even after almost four months, I do not know what to think.

I can start with a thank you for giving me a retreat during this semester, for understanding what was going on, and for everything you have given me in these months.

See you later, TCT.