The definition of shy describes the adjective as someone who is reserved or shows nervousness or timidity in the company of other people. In all probability, this is how someone would describe me after meeting me for the first time. However, it didn’t use to be like this. 

Growing up, I was always outgoing, talkative, and animated. I was carefree and did my own thing without worrying about what others might think. I would say hi to almost everyone—even if I didn’t know them. In other words, I was a social butterfly. 

So, why did I stop being the bubbly person I was? Was it someone or something that took that part of me away?

Well, it is often said that in general if you’re too happy, you’re annoying. If you’re outgoing, you’re either trying too hard, or you’re fake. Neither of those is true, and you should not let that stop you from being yourself like I did. 

During the start of my sophomore year, I started to feel unaccepted and gloomy. I felt like the cheerful and lively person I was once but now seen as vexatious. I had turned reserved and soundless. During this time of doubt within myself, I had encountered many emotions I had never had to undergo, but I did not tell anyone; the feeling of being too dramatic that did not settle well with me.

I had to accept the fact that not everyone was going to like a cheerful, sprightly person. And that was okay. 

I was on my phone one night, scrolling through Instagram, and I saw this quote that had caught my eye. This one quote had been a game-changer, at least for me. In bold letters, it had read: 

“What other people think of you has nothing to do with you and everything to do with them” (Jen Sincero).

The wheels started turning in my head; if I knew it would have taken just that one quote to have it all sink in—oh the things I would have done to see it earlier. Although I felt weird because I didn’t mind being shy, I had adapted to being more reserved. In a way, it felt like I matured because I am now able to look at a situation or person more intimately and not talk too much or jump to conclusions as fast; I rather find myself listening more and looking at the bigger picture—I was more in control of my feelings. 

At the end of the day, I can say that being shy has helped me grow as a person, which is strange because not many can say that. I no longer feel it is a bad thing or anything to be ashamed of. It has assisted me in ways that have helped change my perspective on many things.