I’ve grown to accept my situation with clothes


Store after store, three hours later and still no success—I still haven’t found a pair of jeans that fit me. 

Oftentimes, I get somber about not being able to walk in a store, grab a pair of jeans off the shelf, try them on, check-out, and leave like a good majority of my tall friends. 

This cracks my spirit and confidence, and I start to doubt not only myself but my body image as well.

When I was in third grade, I remember going shopping with my mom and always having to try on multiple pairs of jeans to find the perfect fit, and even when I did find the “perfect fit,” I always felt uncomfortable wearing them. It had nothing to do with the material or the style of the blue denim jeans; instead, it had everything to do with how I thought they looked on me and how restricted I felt while wearing those pieces of clothing. The way my legs are built only made the dilemma worse.

Even when I was younger, I always considered what I wore and how I looked because I knew I wasn’t like the other kids. I was much smaller than the rest of my classmates. I felt that wearing the outfits they wore would take away the attention from my height, but nobody but me seemed to care. 

However, I had soon come to find that practicing four hours a day, almost every day of the week, took an unfavorable turn for my clothing options

At this ripe age, it went way beyond the pants fitting. I took notice of how my friends dressed in their grown-up styles while also observing how well their clothes fit them. Now and then, confusion popped into my head; how did they manage to find clothes that were so cute and more mature? It was always challenging to find grown-up styles in my size at the time, and it still is.   

Although it took me a while to accept the fact that I was going to have to face the problem of not finding pants that fit me perfectly right awayor any piece of clothing for that matterat least I knew why. While doing gymnastics for fourteen years, I was undoubtedly gaining muscle daily. However, I had soon come to find that practicing four hours a day almost every day of the week took an unfavorable turn for my clothing options; the outfits I had once imagined myself wearing were no longer realistic for me.

Over time, my vision of wearing skinny jeans, mom jeans, and flare jeans that I saw on Pinterest, Instagram, and VSCO would not be happening partially because my body is not quite fit for some of these trends. The jeans are either too long that I need them altered or too big on the waist in a baggy manner.   

Some styles make me feel like I look like a box, but I am okay with that, and I am slowly learning to accept that not every trend is meant for me.

In the end, the reality is that I will be cuffing my pants for eternity.