Why women (or anyone) hate the fact to be told to “calm down”

Wise+words

Wise words

No, I will not calm down about the loud burping you do in front of guests or the towels you leave on the ground, or the fact you love to mansplain simple things to me like I’m an incompetent adult without the ability to process my own words.

People love to target women in the media by telling us to calm down when we voice our opinions which, in the long run, is only going to make us more angry.

I know many women can relate to this statement when I say there’s nothing more I hate than being told to “calm down.” Although anyone hates to be told to calm down because it’s quite condescending, for women, it’s particularly harmful because there’s a deeper history behind it. 

Take the word “hysteria,” for example. The misogynistic background left me utterly shocked when I did more research into it. People love to call women hysterical which comes from the Greek root hysteria that means “suffering in the womb.” So basically, the ancient Greeks believed that when a woman was being “irrational,” it was because her uterus was walking around causing trouble. Unbelievable. 

The fact that misogyny has been going on for this long leaves me disappointed and saddened in our society. Since the time of earth, women have always been viewed as illogical, emotional beings whose only job was to reproduce and shut up. 

People love to use this phrase to brush off or silence their emotions and place them into a box they consider “illogical” or “hysterical.” 

People love to use this phrase to brush off or silence their emotions and place them into a box they consider ‘illogical’ or ‘hysterical.’

Growing up as a loud, outgoing, talkative girl, I’m no stranger to people telling me to speak less or that I voice my opinion too much, but if there’s one thing I’ve learned about the traits I have, it’s that it makes being taken seriously in a room full of men a very difficult task, especially when you are confined to an emotional stereotype men have bubbled around us. 

All my life I’ve tried speaking my ideas or opinions, but I’ve been silenced by my peers and many adults, and I want to ask society when is enough, enough. 

Although “calm down” may seem like a simple brush-off-the-shoulder comment, I want FHC to leave this article realizing words have deeper misogynistic meanings and leave permanent impacts we would never see. 

I often find myself pondering the question: If I was a man, would I be told to calm down when voicing my opinions? This question will remain unanswered in my ever-twining thoughts, yet I have an earning feeling the answer is no. 

The media and culture mass spread ideas and thoughts have only backed up my claims. There’s an old Thai proverb that goes “Men are the two front legs of the elephant, and women are the two back legs.” This means women will follow in the footsteps of men along the way which follows similar beliefs as the Greeks I mentioned before.

So, I sit here in my bed, writing this aggressive, anger-filled editorial hoping and praying this reaches the right audience so the phrase “calm down” can once become a thing of the past.