I love the ocean. 

I find the ocean to be one of the most beautiful things in the world. Its outreached touch connects those who are miles and miles apart. 

However, as I write this, I realize I am not near the ocean at all; it is 674.8 miles away. 

Despite the distance, I would do anything to be near the ocean, to breathe in its salty air, and to swim in its warm waters.

Truth be told, I have never actually seen the ocean—at least, not in person. I’ve only ever seen glimpses of it through photos and calls. Regardless, I know I would love it the moment I saw it. I would run right into it and let its coarse, comforting expanse embrace me. I would rejoice in its briny atmosphere and smile with the purest form of happiness because I love the ocean.

How envious I am of those who get to experience its vast waters. How envious I am of those who get to hear its heavenly waves ceaselessly, for I will never be them. I will never be near the ocean.

My love and jealousy of those who get to face the ocean will never be enough to bring me near its venust waters. Nothing I do will ever be sufficient in bringing the ocean close enough to me. It withdraws from me; Its tide retreats, and its waters thrash and whirlpool with negativity and sorrow.

Still, I fight to approach the boundless waters.

I think the best of the ocean despite the danger that it bestows and the damage it inflicts. I could never hate the ocean, albeit having the reasoning to, because I love the ocean too much to ever hate it. Its alluring waters will always remain in my memory.

I have loved the ocean since the moment I realized how important it was to me. It felt as if, for a time, the ocean was all that I had. I thought I knew so much about it, what it loved and what it hated. I once dreamed of seeing it—but now, I know that dream will never come true. 

Still, I am demanded to forget the ocean, and I refuse. 

Some say I should loathe the ocean for what it has done, for the hurt it has caused. Yet loathing is far from what I feel towards it—my fondness for it still remains.

I drowned in the ocean; its negativity and hopelessness were my demise. I fought, and I lost, and then the tide fully withdrew with no sign of return. The ocean destroyed me and then disappeared. Three months and a whole future gone. 

Still, I will never not love the ocean.