Running on fumes


I’m running on fumes, and it’s only the start of junior year. I’m not a senior, and I shouldn’t be getting burnt out this quickly, but it’s happening. High school is without a doubt an emotionally draining experience, but it’s not that hard in the grand scheme of things. Just do the assignments and work hard, right? That doesn’t sound too difficult, so why is it?

I’ve always been an average to a slightly-above-average student. Math doesn’t come too easily to me, but I enjoy reading and writing. I love Model UN, and that class keeps me going every week. It’s near impossible for me to get burnt out when I’m in that class because I love the content and the people, and there’s always something new to do. With writing, I feel I’ve run into a writer’s block that has lasted far too long. I’m trying to find the passion I once had and bring it back, and I do feel that I’m making progress, slowly but surely.

It’s really hard for me to sit down at my computer and just get my homework done. I don’t know why. Webwork seems to chip away at my sanity, even when it is not that difficult. Vocab lists are a drag, but I know I have to get them done. I might not really want to, but I have to. That’s what I struggle with; simply pushing myself to stop being lazy and getting work done is beyond difficult. It’s so much easier to turn to my phone or computer for entertainment, especially when the last thing I want to do is homework. Fun, free weekends with my friends make the weekdays all the more monotonous, and the cycle of the school week is becoming something I dread more and more.

Right now, I’m running on fumes. It’s rough, and I don’t even have an actual reason as to why I’m struggling so much. I’m just a little over halfway through high school with plenty of time to go, so this feeling won’t last; it can’t. I’m sure that I’ll get back on track and get my mindset back into what’s required for the stress of junior year. I’m a decently hopeful person, and I feel that things are going to get better before they get worse. I’ll get back on track, but it’ll just take a bit of time.